Title: The Price Is Right
Author: Christi (firstname.lastname@example.org)
Disclaimer: Not mine, sad though it be.
Author’s Note: Written for control_freak80 as part of our fanfic10
challenge. Again, I think it covers multiple d
It was official: Elizabeth Weir was in the middle of a full-blown fit of the giggles.
Really, it was sort of endearing—once John managed to get past the
astounding idea that
“Okay, that’s the second time that someone has stopped us and asked you something that’s sent you into spasms of laughter,” John pointed out. “What’s so funny?”
Still, the marketplace on this planet was turning out to be more
fruitful than dozens of others they had already visited, so John saw a long
history of being kept in the dark while
“Come on,” he said, unable to hide the hint of exasperation in his tone. “Let’s get this over with.”
Still smiling, she followed him through the booths and vendors, occasionally exchanging bright words with a passerby or sampling a piece of fruit. “Having fun?” he asked wryly.
“Mmm, yes, actually. This is an amazing culture, and the fact that they actually speak a derivative of the Ancient language indicates a historically closer relationship than…” she trailed off, studying what he assumed was a slightly vacant expression that had taken over his face. “Plus, the people here are very…welcoming.”
Even John had noticed that last bit—since he had walked through the ‘Gate, he had been hugged more times than he could count. “Tell me something I don’t know,” he muttered, and she just laughed again.
“Cheer up, John! Finding this planet is a good thing, remember?”
Yeah. He knew that. But there was still something….
That was when an extr
That was John’s limit. “Okay, seriously. What are they saying that’s so funny?”
After she had managed to sober a bit,
He was still waiting for the punch line. “Okay….”
She rolled her eyes in an exasperated look he was already much too familiar with. “Everything, John.”
It took time for him to connect the dots, but once he did, things about
this planet began making a whole lot more sense. “Wait! You mean that they’ve
been asking you….” He stumbled over it, but finally managed a soft, “how much
The smile she flashed him was serene and much, much too wide. “Of course
not.” He was t
It was hard to be sure, but in that moment, John thought that he could actually hear something in his brain snapping.
“WHAT?!” he exclaimed, automatically trying to draw away from the crowd. “But…but…two of them were MEN!”
Seemingly untroubled by his plight,
“Big men! Burly men! Hairy men!” Although John was admittedly quite fond of his own hair, he had ideological objections to the hair of other men. But suddenly, it occurred to him that there was more to this story. “Wait—you’ve been answering them! What are you telling them?”
Putting the strand of beads back with a regretful sigh,
To be honest, he wasn’t sure whether he was relieved or troubled by that new piece of information. But at least he knew that she wasn’t going to sell him off to the highest bidder—not that he had ever thought that she would. Still, John stood frozen, trying to wrap his mind around Butch and his equally hairy buddy wanting a lowest possible price on him, because really, it was a disturbing concept.
By the time he had managed to come to terms with the situation, he found
Silence was his only response, and he turned to see
“That was diplomatic,” was her only reply.
“Gee, thanks,” he retorted.
“So, what, people are just going to keep att
A thoughtful look crossed her face. “Well, there’s one way….”
Now, there was a piece of welcome news. “Good! What is it?”
After one more moment of careful studying,
He really hadn’t been expecting that.
A few blinks later and the fog had mostly cleared. “Uh…how did that help, exactly?”
She shrugged—and, he was pleased to note, se
Strangely, the idea that as far as this society was concerned,
At that, she just rolled her eyes. “Let’s get to the vendor, John.”
Well, he thought ruefully as he followed her through the crowd, it had been worth a shot.
Fanfic10 covered: John/Liz, “How much do you cost?” and I don’t know, I kind of think it covers “Is she really going out with him? Is she really taking him home tonight?” in an abstract sort of way.